The Recalcitrant Spouse
In today' world, Jewish men can easily withhold a
get in
divorce cases. Although civil court may grant Jewish couples a
divorce, Jewish law regards the couple to still be married. Hence, husbands can keep their wives at their mercy and under their control by simply refusing to issue them a
get; indeed, severe form of psychological abuse. For instance, husbands may use the threat of withholding a
get as bargaining power to obtain certain benefits in
divorce cases, such as financial gains or certain custody arrangements. husband may ". . . vengefully and strategically use this dramatically superior bargaining power in negotiating a favorable property settlement or custody settlement with his wife" [Fox, B. ., & Krasnow, H. C. (1988, January). Secular solutions to obtaining a Jewish
divorce.
Illinois Bar Journal, pp. 274-278, 280]. This type of situation occurs when husband makes it entirely clear to his wife that he will not cooperate in the executing and delivering of a
get until his wife complies with his specific demands [
get-extorted agreement presents strong case for coercion, and a wife may be able to seek relief under the law for her husband's unfair bargaining in the divorce. However, it may be difficult to prove that coercion took place, so it may be best for a Jewish wife consult with a lawyer before agreeing to her husband's blackmail]. If wives do not comply with their husbands' requests, husbands can literally keep their wives' marital ties intact for indefinite periods of time (or at least until they comply with their wishes). This situation forces the Jewish woman who believes in and wants to follow Jewish religious law to be faced with the impossible choice of either giving into her blackmailing husband or becoming an
agunah. Although some jewish women stand their ground, many simply choose to give in so that they can move on with their life. In any event, it should be clear here that whether or not Jewish wife accepts her husband's demands and is issued a
get, she is subjected to severe psychological abuse. This situation inflicts severe wounds on Jewish wife, and certainly may leave permanent scars.